2014. A year in review.

2014. What a year we laughed, we cried and took it like a champ. Well, at least I like to think we did. It's hard to remember all 365 days. But I'm going to pick my top 14 moments of 2014.

1. My Spartan race feels like it was so long ago, but it was in January. The week I was doing it I had the flu, but I went that weekend and did a 5-mile obstacle course went to school on Monday and continued going to rehearsals that week. I trained for this event and now I have two medals from it and it definitely was one of the hardest things I did in 2014 making it one of my 14 top moments. 
2. Valentine's Day was definitely a high point for me his year which is weird because its valentine's day, but that night we had an improv show. And we called it the forever alone show. That was fun but afterwards, my sister Macie, Michael, Hayden and I went to Taco Bell around 8 or 9 and we just talked until the manager told us we had to leave so they could close. It was extremely fun and I picked it as a top moment because I love my friends and this was just an example of the fact that we stick together and that none of us are truly alone. 
3. Speaking of improv, I was on our team and we were coached by Nick Haas who is a member of Blimprov in Fresno. But one time at practice he told my teacher asked about recruiting because I was a creative team player and saved  some of the games from crashing. I'm extremely proud of this compliment because I was terrified of improv my freshman year and it was nice to have someone notice my improvement. - Check out their Facebook page! Support local theatre! https://www.facebook.com/Blimprov
4. Being in Annie was super stressful. But the last day or whenever we all went to Denny's was super fun. We all had worked together to make a great show and now we were all friends. And everyone knew how to play the "Schultz" game. 
5. Magic Mountain was where we had our "grad nite" and I spent all night riding rollercoasters with my best friends. And even though our bus broke down on the way there and we had to ride a party bus home I had the time of my life and rode so many rides so needless to say this was a top moment. 
6. Graduating High School was obviously a top moment because I made it through 4 crappy years and was able to have a pretty good time powering through. 
7. I worked with the Kings Players Kid's Camp to put on the Jungle Book this summer and during one of the last nights the compliments I received just blew my mind. Many parents complimented me on my skill of being able to gain control and make sure things ran smoothly and many said that I needed to be paid more. But I loved working with those kids and knowing that I was good at it was just the icing on the cake.
8. Going to college is definitely a top moment because I was so proud of myself. It was really hard making that transition to a new home 12 hours away, but I did it and I cried I would say minimally. I'm proud of being able to do that giving it the potential to make this list.
9. 24 Hour Theatre was I project I did while I was at BYU. I auditioned and I worked with complete strangers rehearsing a new script for 12 hours and performed it that night. I had a lot of fun and I loved my director and the other girl I was working with. It made me remember why I love theatre people again and that's one of the many reasons it was picked as a top moment, 
10. Thanksgiving was really special this year because just when I thought I wasn't going to be able to see my family, my uncle bought me a ticket to fly to our family's Thanksgiving and I am so grateful for that because it definitely helped me power through the semester. And I really enjoy playing soccer with my family.
11. Our last day of class this fall semester there was a dance I went with a couple friends and I literally danced until I couldn't anymore. Let's just say my hair was curly and by the end of the night it was straight from sweat. (Gross I know, but I didn't care). I danced away my problems and I didn't care what others thought. 
12. Finals Week was a top moment for me because I finished all my finals that Monday. I woke up at 6 left my dorm by 7 took all four of my finals and was done by 12. The rest of the week so many people told me that I was their hero, but I was just glad to be done.
13. The day after I flew home I got to go to Hanford High's Footloose rehearsal and it was awesome I loved seeing new and old faces and how far along they were. They are awesome and I'm really excited for them. Remember to go see it at the end of January.  
14. A couple days ago I went to Denny's with my best friends and I've been waiting since I left for college, for the day when we could all hang out again. We talked for we talked for like seven hours and ate a lot of food.

Well, I'm sure I missed a couple but there are my 14 top moments of 2014. 

I was going to do 15 goals for 2015, but that's a lot so I will do 5. 

1. Stop caring about what others think. 
2. Stop worrying about things I can't control.
3. Have more fun and less time wasting.
4. Go to the library and the gym more. 
5. Stop being a hater. 

Well, soon we will be ringing in the New Year. Good luck!

Why I want to be a Theatre Teacher.

ever since I was in the 7th grade I never exactly what I wanted to be when I grew up. I knew I was supposed to be a teacher. (If you have read my personal statement on my previous post, you knew that). But that problem was I didn't really know what subject I wanted to teach. 

I remember being in middle school where my Dad taught 7th grade biology (and was my teacher) and helping grade papers, helping students and studying with science showdown team. Throughout doing all this, I was told that I was good at teaching and I knew that I enjoyed it and was good at it. So that has been my goal ever since. 

This is me in the 7th Grade Science Showdown

If I could formally thank West Hills College Lemoore this would be it because they pointed me in the right direction. I was asked if I wanted to attend a Future Teacher Conference put on by Team Teach at West Hills. And of course I said yes! 

Before I go on I would just like to thank Ms. Potter, she is the one that mentioned my name when they were looking for students to take to the conference. Ms. Potter truly cares about her students and pays attention to their lives and I've never met a student that didn't like her (and if I have then I have completely ignored their opinions because I know she is an amazing teacher). So thank you Ms. Potter for helping me with my life journey! 

So on Halloween of 2013 I attended the conference. At this Future Teacher conference, we were asked to go to groups and attend certain seminars. My friend Racheal and I attended and we found ourselves in a room with a handful of teacher that had gone on to do administration and I wasn't really paying attention because administration hadn't been a goal of mine. However Bobby Peters, the Director of Educational Services Hanford Joint Union High School District began talking and I don't tend to agree with many of his views on education but one thing that he said truly resonated with me. He began talking about he knew he wanted to be a teacher and he loved art; therefore he decided to become and art teacher. He soon came to realize that he couldn't teach something that he was naturally good at. He then decided that he was going to pick his worst subject which was english and he was going to teach that. He knew that by having to learn the subject he would be able to be a better teacher because he was able to relate to the struggles the students were having because him to had to learn just like the students. And at this moment I didn't relate it to myself, I just kept it as a good thought.

Mr. Preston and I at the Future Teacher Conference

My Mom has worked at a summer camp at West Hills for three years now, (don't quote me on that, I could be wrong), but she talked to Mr. Preston, the head of the camp and asked if I could apply even though I wasn't a college student just yet. The summer camp is based on the idea of helping young students in middle school to decide to go to college and it is run by college students aspiring to be teachers. And although I wasn't a college student I still given the chance to be interviewed. When I was interviewed by Mr. Preston I was asked what subject I wanted to teach and I said biology and/or theatre and he just looked at me really confused because those subjects don't entirely mesh.At this point in March 2014, I was struggling with the idea of wanting to teach theatre. But even though I didn't know exactly know what I wanted to teach I was told at the interview (because Mr. Preston believes that since this is an educational venue he tells you after the interview is over what you could do to have a stronger interview,) that he was most impressed with my experience with teaching. And I was hired and I was the youngest team member; that was pretty awesome. 

I then decided that I wanted to teach theatre. 

I remember struggling with this idea. I kept telling myself that you aren't good enough to teach this subject, you yourself have only been doing it for about 4 years. But I finally told myself that I was going to do it. I was going to teach theatre. I knew that because I wasn't naturally good at it and looking at my struggles and my growth between my freshman year and my senior I would be able to teach others because of my personal struggle in the field. 

Dwayne Tubbs, a great teacher and friend, gave me an opportunity to assistant direct, coach or whatever you want to call it. I was casted as Imogene in the show TBS Radio and because my role was a less demanding and we had a lot of freshmen he asked me to help out. I usually stuck to coaching just the freshmen because everyone else would blow me off. But I am so grateful for those freshmen that listened to me who gave me a chance to try it out. And thank you to Mr. Tubbs who commented about the change that he saw in the freshman after working with me. 

This is my favorite picture of Jared from Annie. 

Again I was given another opportunity to help during our high school's production of 'Annie', and my dear friend Jared was casted as Mr. Warbucks. This just happened to be his first theatre experience other than drama class and because I was in his in drama class we would practice all the time. I'd like to say I made Daddy Warbucks, but it was more like molded because Jared was awesome, just needed some refining. But I was able to see Jared transform from himself to a primary character in Annie. 

I would also work with Marissa and Eylssa during class all the time and I realized I loved doing this.So thank you Jared, Marissa and Elyssa for letting my push you around, you guys are awesome. 

I knew watching my high school theatre career ending I wasn't ready to give up theatre and I knew that I was doing what I knew I wanted to do. 

At the end of my high school career, I knew exactly where I was going and what I wanted to do. Back in my third period drama class I was told by Elyssa, Marissa and Mrs. Ankrum that they knew that I was going to be a great theatre teacher. And I am so thankful for them and all who believe in me because they helped me make that decision. 

5C West Hills Summer Camp

When I finished high school I went straight to work at West Hills and I was a teacher assistant so what I did was from like 8-12 the students went to different classes taught by teachers and then after lunch they were able to attend electives. Since I was a TA I was able to work in the "BOOM" class which was a theatre class and I loved it so much! I was an example for almost everything and I loved it. But then I also had the opportunity to teach Improv with an awesome group and the kids loved it. Being given the chance to teach theatre just reiterated that this was what I was meant to do. 

After that in July, I was another teacher assistant for a theatre camp for children put on by the Kings Players. I was basically a babysitter/stage manager/improv teacher. I thoroughly enjoyed working with these kids who were so excited to act in the Jungle Book production we were putting on. And I fell in love with teaching all over again, and it didn't hurt that all the parents complimented me on how I handled the kids. 

After a show when the kids put on the Jungle Book. 

All these experiences helped me to know what I wanted out of this life.

Now I am a theatre studies major at BYU anticipating the fall of 2015 when I can apply to the theatre ed. program. 

I could keep going talking about all the people who helped me make this choice, But I would just like to thank Bianca Ankrum, my very own drama teacher, who never gave up on me and pushed me to grow. I hope I can be a theatre teacher with her capacity to touch the lives of others through theatre. 

Till next time. 

Michaella Scholz

Bad days.

I like to pretend that my blog is for others to read but really its for me. When I'm upset and unheard I usually go to my blog because no one can interject and I mean people can comment, but no one ever does. This is my safe place found on a random url in the middle of the internet. I resort here in times of trial whether my words are posted or not it doesn't matter, but they were written down.

Today was hard. I was expecting today to be a fun filled, lighthearted, relaxing day. Instead, I find myself secluded crying on a Friday night. And I'm not just saying this to get a pitiful response but because I want to say it.

Feelings were meant to be felt. This includes the happiness and sorrow. We live in a society where we are taught to choke back emotions, to be strong and to not let anyone see you cry. Why is this? Why do we pretend to be okay when we aren't? Who thought this would be okay?

We, as humans, all feel the same things. We are all hurt, melancholy, mad, excited, mellow and much more. But instead we are taught to be composed until eventually it's all too much and we eventually explode.

I want to tell you that I am not ok. I had a very bad day. To some it may have seemed minor and conquerable but to me it was a struggle. I have a group project in my theatre class and we are previewing our ten-minute play on Monday and an actor didn't show up, my TA still a hasn't responded to my emails about my final essay, I've been yelled at for minor things, laughed at for making a mistake, and then I have been scorned at for not being cheerful. And I don't to be cheerful, I want to just sulk for a little bit. Is that a crime? Did I deserve all these things that may have pushed me over the breaking point? Who knows, all I know is that it is okay to feel and it is okay to feel bad. Bad days are inevitable. We should all know this. We should accept this as a lifelong truth.

This being said when we see someone having a bad day there is no perfect way to deal with it. They may want someone there and they may not, but they will let you know. Next time you see someone break down don't mock them because you assume that they are weak because you've been there. We all know what it's like to be down there. Maybe if we stop pretending that we are always okay all the time maybe we could find  a way to have less bad days.

Till next time,
Michaella Scholz

Scholarships and College Apps

I know about this topic because I just went through the process of doing it and I thought I would share some tips and my own essays to try and help you out.

First lets talk about College Apps. Colleges get thousands and thousands of essays to read every year so you want to make sure that yours is creative, truthful, and worth reading. I applied to UC Davis, UC Santa Cruz, Fresno State, BYU, and BYU-I. Not to toot my own horn or anything but I got into all of them. (I now attend BYU... If you didn't already know). But the college essay is important but so are SAT/ACT scores, GPAs, volunteer work and extracurricular. But without further ado here is my college app essay:
 
Middle school was just an awkward blur, except for that one day  in my 7th grade math class that will forever etched in my brain, when the girl sitting next to me leaned over and asked if I understood what was going on. My face brightened because I knew what Mr. Warmerdam was teaching and I was more than confident that I could teach her. My lips began to fly with a fiery passion while I explained the Pythagorean Theorem I hardly knew. With one blank stare from her, I knew that she still didn't understand the theorem. Nothing else in the classroom mattered to me at that moment. I needed her to understand.
I continued "teaching her", while Mr. Wamerdam was teaching the rest of the class. Suddenly, "my pupil" began to smile and understand. I felt this overwhelming sense of accomplishment rush through my veins, just as Mr. Wamerdam placed a referral on my desk. The referral was for talking during his lesson. My twelve year old self didn't understand what had just happened. I just remember looking down at my lap and tears beginning to form in my eyes. She thanked me as I just sat there staring at this piece of paper traumatized, still not understanding how I had gotten into trouble.
Since that wonderful, horrible day, I have reflected on my learning, and the joy I felt while teaching. Throughout my years of school I have been able to find opportunities to teach different peers, different subjects. I come from a world where I was taught the importance of education; the education opened doors for opportunity. I want to make a difference in student's lives and help them move up in the world through my passion for teaching.  

This is the essay I used for pretty much everything. It has other stuff attached to it about involvement and financial needs but that's boring. But I would change it to fit prompts and cut it down to fit word requirements. This being said there were other times where it was just easier to write a new essay but try and minimize the amount of essays you write or else you are going to be burnt out really fast.

I filled out about 40+ scholarships and I got 5 scholarships. (The Latino Peace Officer Award, Ken Hill Scholarship - Scholarship for Future Educators, A Quilting Scholarship, NARFE, and the Pioneer Middle School Scholarship.) As you can see you just have to keep writing and writing in hopes of snagging a couple.
 
I applied for the Smitt Camp Scholarship for Fresno State and these were some of the essays I wrote for that.
 
This first essay was supposed to be about global awareness.
 
“You guys have a lot of different trees. We don’t have these kind of trees at home.” This passed me as strange when my cousin said this. But it made sense; the Valley in California is not going to look the same as my cousin’s hometown in Maryland. Being born in Utah and then moving to the Valley when I was very young, I have not seen much of the world or even the United States. The United States is such a big country, full of different places, foods, people, and apparently even trees. I want to visit all of the States, but I want to start in my cousin's hometown. He lives on the complete opposite side of the country. I want to see how and where he lives and be able to experience a different part of America. I also want to see their different trees.
Second one was supposed to be about an encounter with art.
 
My most memorable encounter with art was in my own home. My great grandmother’s art was hung up around the house as well as the art my dad had made. Everyday I would walk around my house and see pieces that were very realistic, painted with lots of little strokes and pastel colors, pieces that were bold, brightly painted abstracts. They were all great pieces of art but so very different. These pieces of art in my home taught me that we can be different and coincide in perfect harmony.
 
And then my personal statement. And just for the record I got the alternate spot for that scholarship. By I really owe a huge thanks to my Ap Lit. teacher Ms. Potter she helped me rework these essays time and time again. This leads me to my next point, always have someone read your essays and I know this maybe hard because this isn't a response to a book or a history essay but its about your life. But if there is a typo and/or bad grammar they will just move on so make sure you have someone read your essays, it could make all the difference. But always look for scholarships ask your grandparents, parents, places you volunteer, places you work because random places give out scholarships. My grandpa sent me a clipping of a magazine from a organization he is a part of and all I had to do was write an essay about how we can appreciate federal employees more (at least that's what I thought it was.). But I won 1000 for just writing an essay.
 
Here it is:

At the beginning of America the government wasn’t just a distant institution, we were our government. The government wasn’t a separate entity that served us. We as a country embraced “We the people” and we were a part of the system that we built. We have lost this sense of pride in our government. The gap between the people and Washington keeps growing; and because of this, people who carry out services for the government such as construction, research, and innovation have been forgotten. These people work daily to build this country and better the lives of our people. By viewing the government as an institution that we are a part of, we will ensure we appreciate our peers for the work they do everyday. This view can be put into place by exposing teenagers and children to their government throughout their education.

This gap between the government is rooted because in reality not every American can visit Washington D.C. and be a part of that system. However, local government leads to state governments overall ending in the Federal government. We need to be involved in our local and state governments, by taking part in the process we begin to appreciate it and then we begin to see all the people who carry it out from congressmen to mailmen. Being a part of our government will make us recognize all the people who work for the government, our neighbors, other parents in the PTA, and our dog sitter, we begin to see what they give up to make the invaluable contributions to the country we live in.

 

 

Seeing ourselves as part of the government is a viewpoint that isn’t built in a day. Its grown over a period of time as we take part and listen to others. This viewpoint can be discovered at public schools. Most seniors have to take economics and government before they graduate and each class is usually a semester long. I chose to take AP Government and AP Economics during my senior year. Therefore, instead of each class being just a semester each class is a full school year. I believe that seniors ought to take a full year of government because this allows students to learn curriculum and discuss what is going on in the government right now. Students in the semester class are rushed through the basics of government without having time to stop and thinking about what they are learning. It is very different to learn about something and then being able to apply it to your own life. Throughout my studies I have learned about the complexity of government and have begun to appreciate not only political leaders but those workers who carry out everyday tasks. Through class discussions throughout the year I know that every person who works for the federal government contributes to this great country and I truly appreciate their service every day.

We can’t make people appreciate all the work that is done for them but we can teach them about their government and discuss federal employees who serve them everyday in an active learning environment. This class shouldn’t just be for seniors but students should be taught about their governments from a young age. Each school year should touch on government and each year the curriculum should go more in depth. Being taught government doesn’t put beliefs in students heads but gives them a chance to discover that there is more to our government than just “rich white guys in suits.”

    America wasn’t built in a day and neither is a perspective. Federal employees do a lot for America and they should be recognized. By teaching students more in depth about our government students will be able to discover the part they play in their own government and this will segway to their appreciation of the work that is done for them. We the people and we need to continue educating students about the part they play and by doing that they will be able to recognize the federal employees that serve them everyday.

(Yes I know this formatting is whack but I don't know what's going on and I'm really frustrated at this point.) ANYWAYS this is the essay I wrote and I was able to answer the prompt and tie in my love for education. And I totally owe Mrs. Evangelo a thank you because her lectures totally inspired this essay. So keep writing and keep up on dues dates because they come fast.

 Till next time and Good Luck!

Throwback to graduation! :)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dramaturgy

Dramaturgy is a new occupation that has emerged from the theatre world.  A dramaturge is not defined clearly because it constantly redefining itself. But to put this into simpler terms the dramaturge works with the writer and the director to refine the script and show. A dramaturge can do new play dramaturgy which works with the playwright to bring out all the ideas and intent they have and to make sure that it makes sense and is historically accurate (if that applies). They can also work with the director, production team, and actors to make sure that the play is coherent and again historically accurate. The dramaturge can also work with the audience by putting extra information about the time era and general facts about the play and many of them do websites that allow audience members learn more about the show.

I'm talking about this because I think this is really cool occupation and not many people know about it. (Which really is a shame.) But its out there and you can study it in college and all that jazz. In class we are practicing new play dramaturgy where the dramaturge works with the playwright and so we all had to write plays and then from small groups we had to pick one. Mine was not chosen (its fine people like comedy more than dramas... lame,  I know.) But I'd still like to share it with you. But this is a sad play there isn't a happy ending its just life. Without further ado....

The Ones We Never Get To Love

By Michaella Scholz

Cast: Shelby – Young woman who has been recently married and just found out she lost her baby.

Max- Shelby’s husband who is very overprotective.

 

Shelby is sitting quietly alone. We can tell she is deep and thought. Max and Shelby are have been married almost a year and Shelby 21 weeks with child. Max comes home from work. Shelby does not look at Max.

Max

 Shelby?

Shelby

 In here.

Max

 Hey darling

Max kisses Shelby on the cheek to which there is no response.

Max

 Shelby? Are you okay?

Shelby

 I’m fine.

Max

Promise?

Shelby

 Sure.

Max

 Well what’s wrong then?

Shelby

 Nothing. Nothing is wrong.

Max

 Babe, I know you. Just tell me.

Shelby

 Max, please.

Max

I just want to help.

Max pauses and grabs Shelby’s hand

Max

 Please, let me help you. That’s what I’m here for.

Shelby

 It’s just so hard.

Staring off into the distance

 When I was a teenager I loved to be around babies. I loved to hold them and cuddle them and pretend they were mine. My biggest fear was not being able to have a baby. That thought would always be in the back of my mind. When we found out that we were pregnant I was so happy but I was also so scared that it could all be gone in an instant.

Max

 You’re almost there. We are going to have a baby!

Shelby

 Except I’m not.

Max

 Wait what are you talking about?

Shelby

 I miscarried. I miscarried. I had a baby inside me and now it’s gone. My fear came true.

Max: Shelby, I’m so sorry.

Shelby is quite and still not looking at Max.

 Max

 This isn’t our only chance. We can try it again.   

Shelby

 Except for the fact that I have “Uterine Wall Scarring”.

Max

 Babe, We can overcome that. 

Shelby

 You don’t understand.

Shelby finally looks at Max

Shelby

It makes it really hard for me to have children.

Max

 Hard is not impossible.

Shelby

 But I don’t know if I could do this again. I never got to see Marcus.

Max pauses. Processing the fact that he was going to have a son.

Max

We were going to have a boy?

Shelby

 Yeah I found out today.

Max

 I was going to have a son.

Shelby

 I’m sorry.

Max

 This isn’t your fault.

Shelby

 Yes it is.

Max

 Stop saying that. You had no control over this.

Shelby

 The one thing that I am supposed to be able to do, like every other woman I can’t. And I can’t do anything about it. And I’m so sorry. I know you wanted children and I can’t give you that. You have a job and you provide for me and all you wanted was a family to come home to and I can’t give you that. We are already married so I’m not going anywhere. But if you want to a get a divorce and find another woman who can give you a healthy and living son. I understand…

                              Max

Shelby. You’re my family.

Shelby

 I’m not enough.

Max

 You are.

Shelby is quite and nonresponsive Max grabs her hand

Max

 We are in this together

Shelby is still quite. Max turns her face so she is looking at him and Shelby begins to sob.

Max

Hush. Hush.

Shelby

What happens to him Max?

Max?

Max

 I don’t know.

Shelby

 I want my baby.

Max

I have to be enough.

I love you. And that has to be enough.

Shelby

I love you too.

Max

If we are able to have a baby, great. If not, it’s okay. I have a beautiful wife who I get to take care of for the rest of my days.

Shelby

And I have a great husband who acts like a child anyways.

Shelby begins to softly laugh and lets Max hold her. After a pause the phone rings. Max gets up to go get the phone.

Max

Hello?

Uhh… Mom! How are you?

Good, good.

No mom it’s okay you don’t need to come down for the baby.

Max’s mom keeps pestering him about coming to visit when that baby is born Max just keeps getting more frustrated.

No mom please!

Can we please talk about this later?

Mom there is no baby to see!

Max realizes that he had been quite rash and loud with the last line and looks over at Shelby who has now curled up onto the couch.

I’m sorry..  

I have to go.

     Max hangs up the phone and goes over to Shelby

Max

 Have you told your mom?

                                     Shelby shakes her head no

Max

 I can if…

Shelby again shakes her head no

Max

She needs to know.

Shelby

 I can’t.

Max

 Why not?

Shelby

Why couldn’t this have just worked out? Why did this happen to us?

Max

 I don’t know.

Shelby

 I just want to die.

Max

Don’t say that.

Shelby

 But it’s true

Max

What about me?

Shelby just stares at him shocked

Max

Aren’t I enough? You say you love me but then you want to die?

Max

 I’m here and it’s like that doesn’t even matter to you.

Shelby

 But Max… You do.

Max walks out. Shelby is all alone left in the silence. Max walks back in with a blanket that he drapes around Shelby.

Max

 I didn’t want to marry you so that I could have kids. I married you because I love you. And I love you more than I did when I asked you to marry me.

He is still your baby.

Shelby

 I know.

Max

 He loves you.

Shelby

 I love you. You would have made a great Father.

Max

 Shelby, I can’t imagine a better mother than you. You’re loving. You make everybody smile. And you, are so beautiful.

Shelby? When you said you couldn’t tell your mom about the miscarriage what did you mean about that?

Don’t shut me out now?

Shelby

 I was supposed to have another brother. His name was going to be Marcus. My mom already knows that if it was a boy I was going to name him Marcus. I don’t want her to have to live through that again. I remember her crying all the time trying to cope with the fact that her son was gone. She closed up and I felt like I barely saw her. I can’t do that to her again.

I know I have to tell her.  I just don’t know when to do it.

Max

 I can be there with you.

Shelby

 No.

Max

But…

Shelby

 Max I know you want to be there for me but this is something I need to do for myself.

And my mom.

Max

 Okay.

Shelby

 Thank you.

Max

Why didn’t you ever say anything?

Shelby

Um it’s not something we talked about. And I wouldn’t even know how to bring it up.

Max

Yeah I understand. But you know you can talk about anything with me.

Shelby

Yes I know.

                              Max

I’ll always be here for you.

Shelby

 Yes I know.

Max

 Always.

Shelby

I don’t know what I would do without you.

Max

You’d be fine. You are a strong woman with a big heart.

Shelby

But I don’t think I could do this alone.

Max

This?

Shelby

Just life in general.

Max

 Well good thing you don’t have to.

Shelby

 Neither of us do.

Max

For better or for worse.

Shelby

In sickness and in health.

Max

Till death do us part.

There is a knock at the door

Max

Do you want me to get that?

Shelby

No its okay. I’ve got it.

Shelby goes offstage.

Shelby: Mom?

Life happens and we find people who get us to keep going. And in the end it will all work out. I promise. Till next time folks!