Finally a good week.

Those that know me, know that I am pretty tough on myself. And so this always makes new things really hard. I get stressed out and discouraged fairly easy. But this week I was finally feeling good.
Monday there was no school so I think that had a lot to do with it. That extra day makes all the difference. So hopefully I can make this week a good week, even if I do have class and work on Monday. Haha! I can do it! So that day I did tons of homework, cleaning and just prepping for the week. Tuesday I have work in the morning and class till 5. Work started real good. I went to get something out of the drawer and not only did the drawer come out, but it somehow got turned over. Luckily we have big sink so I just through everything in there. I also fell down the stairs in the HFAC that day too. Not a great start to the week, but I decided not to let that get me down. And then the rest of the week was just fine! I have been discouraged lately because I thought I wasn't succeeding in work and in school like I should have. HEY MICHAELLA! IT'S ONLY BEEN THE SECOND WEEK OF SCHOOL. So I just tell myself that. But I killed it during a scene that we did in my beginning acting class. And man, good acting can just change your whole perspective. Another thing that has been a roadblock for me is not being able to be a missionary. Those who know me, don't get crazy. Let me explain what I mean, because I am sure everyone who knows me, knows that I have been saying that I wouldn't go on a mission. This summer I had the opportunity to teach and help he missionaries in my ward. And I loved it. I loved teaching this gospel because I love this gospel. And then I got to Provo. We don't have missionaries in our ward. Everybody already knows about the gospel. So I felt really heartbroken. I had loved being able to teach so I thought about going on a mission. And every time I did it felt weird. I never felt that peace but I felt anxiety and such an unsettling feeling. So I prayed, and I prayed a lot because I felt like I was missing something, that I wasn't doing my part. I get at least 10 emails every Monday from friends serving about all the great things they are doing and I wanted that. And serving a mission isn't a unrighteous decision, so I was very confused. Sitting in Stake Conference, I was listening when a line came to my mind, "You will have the opportunity to serve, just not now." I got my answer. I don't think that was the answer I wanted. But I know that God is aware of me and my desires, but maybe He has something better in mind. And I trust Him. So I will keep doing what I am doing and continue trying my best. This week I did a lot of fun things such as Fall Fest, a Stake Activity at the Provo Rec Center, and to end the week the Lantern Festival. These things just are another witness to me that this is a good place for me right now. I can learn temporal and spiritual things, be surround by great people, and have fun. The Lanterns symbolize good fortune! So here is to making this a great semester, year and life!