I know God is real because of FHE

Something that Latter Day Saints (the politically correct term for Mormons) practice is Family Home Evening. This is a time that is supposed to be dedicated for Family time and often consists of a lesson and activity. But because here at BYU in YSA Wards (Young Single Adult) we don't have families so we are put into groups and the call a"Mom" and a "Dad" but since we have really big groups so there are 3 so we just call them group leaders. Since we have only been here at BYU for a couple weeks there weren't leaders yet and we had just barely been separated into our groups. But after the first couple times I had come to hate FHE. My roommate didn't like coming, I felt like I didn't belong, and that they could get along without me. So I thought to myself that I would not go to family home evening.

And then I had an interview with a member of the bishopric.

And I was called as one of Group Four's FHE Leader.

And I was shocked. This was a calling that I did not want but I accepted it anyway. This was a calling I needed. I never told anyone that I hated FHE I just kept that and the fact that I was done going to myself. I know truly that this calling was inspired.

Today I was set apart and usually its a normal prayer to help me know what I can do and how to do it etc. But in this prayer that was said for my benefit was very different. Brother Nelson blessed me that I would be able to grow not only spiritually but socially in this calling. When he said these words I knew that God had inspired everything he was saying because he knew that I didn't feel like I belonged in this group and I was having a hard time. The next thing Brother Nelson said was that my studies wouldn't suffer because of this calling and that was a big concern for me because Monday (the day where FHE is supposed to take place not only at BYU but around the world) I have class from 9am-7pm and when I was called I was very concerned about that fact that FHE usually takes place at 7 on Mondays and I know that God knew this concern. One of the last things that Brother Nelson blessed me with was the ability to use my talents: sociability and likeability to further my calling and I know this was God's reminder to me that I am capable and prepared to do this calling. I am so grateful that through the power of the priesthood I was able to listen to my Heavenly Father talk to me through Brother Nelson and that even through I still have some doubts about this calling that I can do this through His help.

Just another message from "The Lord's University" or at least that's what they call it here. I just call it BYU because the Lord is everywhere not just here.

Till next time :)

Hot Dog Eating Contest At FHE.

This was my first FHE with my group.

Theatre Media Arts. Here at the B to the Y to the U.

At BYU there is definitely a different spirit here. Mostly everyone here is LDS. We pray in every class, there are devotionals every Tuesday, and lots and lots of church activities. But I think something that is vey special is our professors bring up the gospel in their lectures. They manage to teach and connect to the gospel to our lives and studies.

At the beginning of our lecture on Monday (sorry this has taken so long but I've been really sick and I'm currently drinking emergen-c and airborne) our professor told us to take out a piece of paper and number it one to twenty. He began to explain to us that we were going to take a personality test. We continue to answer questions based on words and pictures that most describe us. At the end we are given a color that describes our personality. Mine was blue. Blue describes the creative and emotional people like me. (Hopefully I describe this correctly but its all just from memory). My close second color was Orange which are you free spirit attention loving people. Then Green is very logical and they use reasoning.  And then gold is the person who has to know everything and what's going on. These weren't that important except for the fact that it exposed that we are all different. (I may have mixed up the colors but that's not important to what I'm talking about).

Our professor than began to talk about how when we know someone's type we can't predict what choices they are going to make or how they are going to react because there are always lurking variables (I'll throw a little stats lingo in there) but if we know how a persons mind works we are better fit to love them. We can love them in a way that they can understand, in a way that is comfortable for them. Our professor then went to talk about his wife how she is the type of person who always has to have her house perfect with everything in the right spot before she goes to bed and she has to plan far in advance what she is doing for the week. My professor is blue (not literally) so he is very outgoing and loving. He decided that he was going to take his wife to dinner in San Fran. (They live here in Utah). So he gets her and when he gets to the airport she was freaking out because she didn't know what was going on nor did she know if she was going to be ready.

Our professor told this story to illustrate how he tried to show his love for his wife in a way that he would want to have dinner. But she was very different from him and he should have done something that she would have liked and would have been something that she would have been comfortable with and would have loved.

He then goes to talk about the Savior. Our Savior knows how to love us exactly how we need it. And we know that we are to love one another as he loves us. This means we need to love others the way they need to be loved in a way they can understand. Often times we get caught up in the "Golden Rule" treat others like you want to be treated and yes this is often applied to kindness but we need to treat others and love others in a way that makes sense to them. Love them in the best way possible for them.

We learn a lot here a BYU, way more than I would have ever learned than anywhere else.
That's it for now! I'm trying to blog more but college kinda gets in the way... Oh well!

This picture is in honor of being a blue person!
And BYU football!

Here is to the dancers.

This post is driven mostly because I just finished watching BYU's "Evidance" Dance Concert. This concert consisted of folk dancing, ballet, contemporary, ballroom and lots of others. But I'd like to just talk about dance.

**Disclaimer: I'm not actually a dancer. I like to pretend but I'm not nor do I actually pose as one.**

That being said this post will be dedicated to my roommate Hannah, and my friend Ben, and Chayce. They are my friends from BYU (they are literally the best) who are amazing dancers and they don't mind if I watch their rehearsals or if I pretend like I can dance. So here is to them!

I've always loved watching dance. If there was one thing I could go back and tell my mom to do for me it would to be put me in dance classes (even though this didn't happen, my mom did awesome and I had a great childhood). I love attending dance recitals, watching So You Think You Can Dance, and watching dance numbers in musicals.

The reason why I love dance is the beauty and strength of it. Have you ever looked at a dancer's legs? They are so strong, yet when they dance they are as light as a feather. Dancers have amazing discipline and can make you feel something without saying a word. Dancers tell a story and there are so many different stories to be told that dancers keep dancing and every time a new story is told.

I saw this really beautiful contemporary number tonight where a man and a woman each carried each other through the number (I hope that makes some sense). Partner work to me is very interesting; neither partner is more important than the other and throughout the number each person is lifting and supporting each other.

Tuesday (which was an awful day) I was able to sit in on Hannah and Ben's Latin rehearsal and they walked in there not having a routine and within 2 hours they had a routine they could work off but it was amazing to see my two funny and quirky get down to business. They would start and they were serious (not in the boring way though and they only stayed this way until they finished or messed up). Partner work is all about trust and you have to trust your partner or it doesn't work.

I relate dancing to life. You have to be dedicated and strong yet you try to be beautiful and graceful (and if you have seen Mulan 2 this should make you think of the first song in the movie) but you don't start out that way you work and somehow you mold yourself into the kind of person you want to be. And then partner dancing could be between an guy and girl or two friends. Both relationships take lots of trust and even if you practice at one point you are going to have to go all in and hope they catch you. If they don't you get up and try again. Maybe not exactly the same way or if you and partner work it out (also known as communication).

As you can see dancing is just an extension of life plus the story they are telling in the moment. This being said put your kids in dance, go see the ballet, appreciate and go see it.
This is my spiel about dance. Take it or leave it :)

 

 

 

This is Ben trying to deal with my inability to dance.

But I try! That should count for something, right? Lol. 

Laundry 101 For College Students

I'm writing this because I'm a laundry guru. Thanks mom! But I'm here to share my knowledge with you college students or future college students!

But I've only done laundry at 3 places my house, the Hanford Laundromat, and at BYU. So your college may do things differently just btdubbs.

1. First off make sure you get acquainted with your school's laundry room; if you have friends that are already there that's the best. My laundry room for one washer it is $2.00 and for the dryer .80 BUT if you use your BYU ID card (BYU lets you put money on your card almost like a debit card) then the washer is .80 and the dryer is .37 so I came to college with like $10 in quarters to start me off and some cash to change into quarters just so I could transfer $25 onto my card. So know I just have a bunch of quarters... Yeah so if you can talk to someone who can give you tips and tricks for your school that's awesome.
2. Laundry Baskets - There are so many different ones you can pick depending on what you want. There are ones with compartments so you can separate clothes, drawstring bags, mesh pop up hampers, and THE LAUNDRY HAMPER BACKPACK. If you couldn't tell from my excitement that's the one I have. It was the best $15 I've ever spent in my life. Its literally the best thing ever. Its a tall hamper and it has 4 poles (like the ones you use for tents) that go in the side so that it stays up, its really thick material, has two outside pockets, the top zips closed, AND IT HAS BACKPACK STRAPS. Considering I live on the top floor and I have to go down 4 flights of stairs to do laundry I just slip on my hamper and trek down stairs. I'm really against baskets because they are really bulky and hard to carry. But whatever you choose just thing about how functional it is versus how cute it is because in the end that's what is going to matter. I bought mine from Amazon and it was called Oversized Laundry Duffle Bag with Shoulder Strap - Purple by DormCo and its currently out of stock but just look around :)
3. Laundry Soap - Get the pods. Just do it. You can grab a couple pods versus the whole jug or box. Then just toss the pods in with the clothes.
4. Sharing a Laundry Room - So here is the deal the times when you want to do your laundry there are going to be a bunch of people trying to do theirs too. This being said you may not be able to wash your clothes separately as much. Whites can not be washed with colors though. Period. I saw a girl put in a pair of white paints and a red shirt in the same machine and I think I almost died. Instead of doing that this is what I do I usually do white and then everything else I put colors, jeans and towels when I have them together. This being said if you have a new red shirt or pair of jeans that you haven't washed yet wash them only with like colors because they are more likely to bleed and ruin your other clothes other than that you should be good. And I don't know if this is just BYU but their dryers are huge. I usually use three washing machines and one dyer with one extra cycle and I haven't have any problems. (You can only use those many machines if you get up early and get down there).
5. Panties and Socks - Yes I said panties because I can. But here in my hall there is a big problem with people taking your laundry out right when it hits zero because girls are crazy and they want clean clothes too. (This hasn't happened to me because I watch the clock and I always go early to pick up my laundry). But between transfers between machines and baskets whether you are the one moving them or not socks and underwear tend to fall on the floor and/or get lost so I HIGHLY RECOMMEND to get a mesh bag for your underwear and socks. I have one and its awesome. I put in my underwear, socks and bras zip it up and throw it in with my other clothes. No more awkwardly picking your panties off the floor or lost socks.
6. Time your laundry - Its really annoying when people move your clothes or waiting for a machine. To save us from this problem make sure you are paying attention to when your laundry will be done and make sure you can get it (or even your roommate). Just so everyone gets a turn.
7. Not everything needs to be washed - If you wear something such as a cardigan for half a day and its still clean, hang it back up wear sweats as PJs a couple times. Just be aware of what needs cleaning. Underwear needs to be washed after every use. Yeah I went there.
8. Everything needs to be washed eventually - Not just clothes but towels, hand towels, sheets, bath mats, pillow cases etc. Plan accordingly aka plan ahead and get into a schedule.
9. Stains - Here is the key to stains: Rinse them out. Say you get food on a shirt, oil on a skirt, or say you had a special visitor you weren't expecting. RINSE THEM OUT. As soon as possible rinse them in the sink or just bring it with you when you get in the shower. Save your clothes. Rinse the stain, spray Shout or Oxiclean or whatever and rinse it again and just throw it in your hamper. If you don't rinse the stain often times it gets set into the clothes because of the hot water/dryer.
10. Not enough for a full load- If you don't have a lot of clothes (and your friends with your roommate) then you can always wash clothes together (only if you are comfortable) but it you only have a couple items it saves a washer and you can split the cost so it is often times a life saver just to throw in a couple of things. 

That's all I got for now but if you have questions or comments let me know!
This cougar is out! (That's BYU's mascot if you didn't know)

Self Esteem

I feel like this is a big subject out there in the world.

"1. Low self-esteem is a thinking disorder in which an individual views him/herself as inadequate, unlovable, and/or incompetent. Once formed, this negative view permeates every thought, producing faulty assumptions and ongoing self-defeating behavior.
2. Among high school students, 44% of girls and 15% of guys are attempting to lose weight.
3. Over 70% of girls age 15 to 17 avoid normal daily activities, such as attending school, when they feel bad about their looks. Brighten someone’s day by posting encouraging messages on your school’s bathroom mirrors. Sign up for Mirror Messages.
4. More than 40% of boys in middle school and high school regularly exercise with the goal of increasing muscle mass.
5. 75% of girls with low self-esteem reported engaging in negative activities like cutting, bullying, smoking, drinking, or disordered eating. This compares to 25% of girls with high self-esteem."

All that info is from https://www.dosomething.org/facts/11-facts-about-teens-and-self-esteem its a website that wants to help stop "negative activities" which is a great idea but not exactly what I want to talk about.

I do suffer from low self-esteem but never to the point that I've attempted "negative activities" (I'm sorry if the quotations make it sound sarcastic, they totally are not these acts are very serious). Although I haven't done these things I don't have great self-esteem. But I do have great self-confidence. I am very confidant in what I can do but I am not always thinking highly of my looks and such.

But I've been thinking about this for quite sometime (because I've been meaning to write this blog post for days) and I realized that no one told me I wasn't pretty or that my hair wasn't right or that my thighs are a weird shape. But somehow my ideas of beauty had been skewed by media and other women and boys and everything. And I'm bring my own self down because of someone else's ideas.

The sad part is for a long time it didn't matter what anyone said I always saw myself below others. People could say that I looked nice, pretty or beautiful and I would shrug it off because I thought that they were just saying that to be nice.

And that is why **drum roll please** you have to build up your own self esteem. Even if every attractive guy tells you you're beautiful, you are probably going to be very self conscious. The only way to build up your self esteem is going to be yourself. And you're going to have to put some elbow grease into it and its going to be hard but you can do it. No matter what I'm rooting for you!

Tips to building your self esteem:

1. Realize your a child of God - I realize that not everyone is religious but it does help those who are. I have a friend who struggles with an eating disorder but she has been able to overcome it and she did this through her relationship with Jesus Christ. She learned through lots of help and lots of prayer that she is a child of God and that her body was given to her by her Heavenly Father who loves her very much and that she needs to take care of her body because it is a very special gift. You were created in His image and he loves you and doesn't want you to hate the body he gave you.
2. Start by giving yourself a good look in the mirror - Find things you love about yourself. I love my eyes and I have very nice hands. I like being short and small(even if I look 14 instead if 18). Focus on these things and try not to pick yourself apart.
3. Do Stuff - When you sit alone and just think it can be good but it can also be very bad. I know that my generation suffers from over thinking all the time but its good to go out there and have fun. Especially if you find a niche (a place where you feel like you belong) a sense of belonging will do wonders for yourself esteem. So go out there. :)
4. Bad Days - Sometimes you are going to have bad days where you feel down or you almost relapse into a "negative activity." All you have to is pick yourself up and keep going. And if it is really serious make sure you talk to someone and get help so you can have a better day tomorrow.
5. Boys, Boys, Boys - I get it we all like them (okay not all of us but you do you booboo, no judging here) and literally its happened to all of us. We like this guy but he doesn't like you he likes someone else such as a stranger, your best friend, or you sister. If he doesn't like you don't worry about it. Who wants to be in a relationship with someone who has to learn to like you? There are thousands of attractive men out there (trust me I see them everywhere) and someone is going to love you with all their heart and soul. So chin up! And for now go have some fun!
6. People Love You SOOOOO MUCH! - Have you ever loved someone so much and you wish they just knew how much? I feel this way about a lot of my friends. If they could just see what I see and how amazing they are and to know how much they are loved they would never have a bad. That being said we need to take a step back and think about the people who love us and how bad they want us to be happy.
7. Sing, Dance, Let go. - Have you ever tried to be sad when singing "Shake it off" or "Bang Bang"? That's right! When I sing it makes me feel so much better. So find something that you can do to release all the negative so you can move on. And just be happy.

I know how hard life can be but its harder when you are hard on yourself. Give yourself a break.
Till next time and who knows when that will be considering I'm way behind on my reading for three classes.. Whoops...

Later! XOXO

This picture was taken at mutual (Mormon

youth group). We had all the girls write about each other and each girl had her picture taken in front of all the nice things the others had said about her. And we didn't get to see them till after they were developed. But it was fun to see what others loved about you.  



BYU DIGITAL TOUR

Since my friends and my family can't all come to Utah I decided to do a virtual tour of the campus! Don't judge my messiness or my bad pictures!

 

We will start with the school!

 

 To the east of the campus are these huge mountains! Provo lies in a valley in Utah and versus Hanford, California where the valley is  like a bowl in Provo the valley is shaped like a taco allowing the smog to be blown away. (Yeah that's a big problem in Hanford. Gross).  And look at the 'Y' on the mountain! I know its cool! You can hike up to it, people do it all the time.

 

But anyways! BYU is huge! To get to the rest of the campus from Helaman Halls or where I live

you have to climb up Freshman Hill. 

 

Ugh its a long climb.

 

This is a picture that I took when walking to my dorm... Yeah its like three times this and then I have to walk to my building! (So apparently Freshman Hill is supposed to be really fun to slide down in the winter when there is snow).

 

At the end of freshman hill there is the front of Helaman Halls or the group of buildings where I live and the cafeteria that I eat at called the Cannon Center.

 

 And then I walk to my building!

 

 

David John is my building! Yeah I live in the D building.. Go ahead and laugh.

I did. Lol.

But yes I am the top floor of the David John which is the 3rd Floor. And our hallway is decorated with a beach theme.

 

 

Yeah this surfboard is right outside my dorm! Its uber cute:)

 

 

And here we go!!

 

 

That's my desk and my shelves above my desk.

I made the calendar and the lamp shade.

Oh and the chair that comes with the desk functions as a rocking chair. It's pretty great! 

 

 

This is my bulletin board and the sticky notes that Hannah and Nicole left me when I was homesick. And above the sticky notes (not seen in the picture) I have posted some of the notes I got from my graduation party. I have opened Hayden's (Shout out to you!), my brother Merrick's and my Dad's.

 

 

This is the wall over my bed. There is a cork board strip that comes with the room so that means more pictures!  I got all my pictures printed from snapfish and it was only like $3 for 50 prints. Good deal and I have more than you see on the wall I just don't know where to put them yet.

Those dice are from my car that I couldn't take with me but they make me happy so I took them with me. And a picture I drew that says "She believed she could, so she did" and I plan on putting more artwork and letters up there too.

 



 

 That is my bed and it is super tall if I stood next to it, it comes right underneath my "bust". I have three plastic bins from target under there with random things I haven't exactly put away yet. And I have two bins under there with food and extra bathroom stuff. Good combo, I know.

 

 

 

This is how much space it between the two beds.... And our stools because the beds are so high. But in reality I use the stool to climb on the  fridge and then on to the bed. Oh and that's my hamper.

 

 On the other side of the room is my closet! 

 

That's the outside because I freakin love purses!

 

 

This is the inside there is stuff hanging on the doors but I didn't take a picture because its like bras and stuff. And you don't need to see that. Even if they are super cute.

 

Next is the bathroom!

 

That's the sink! And we each have a shelf above the sink and a drawer underneath.

 

The shower! Yeah I know its a cute one!

 

And this is all our stuff above the toilet! We are so organized!

So that's mine and Nicole's dorm and bathroom. The bathroom opens up into another dorm with Hannah and Lauryn. So we all share the bathroom.

 

I'm not going to lie. Right now I just got off the phone with my family and I cried the whole time. Moving is hard and its not for everyone. But I know I can do this. I know I'm meant to be here. Sometimes I think about what if I went to another school closer to home or a community college and it never feels right. But here at BYU there are moments where I look around and I am grateful to be here and I know this is where I need to be. I absolutely love it here its just hard moving on from your family to having a roommate family. But I love my roommates they let me borrow shoes when I don't have the right ones for my job uniform, they go eat with me, and they make sure I'm okay. I love them and I'm so blessed to have them. I miss everyone from Hanford so if you ever want to call or text please do. I'm always afraid to because I don't want to cry but its good to get it out.

 

This scripture just always pops in my head when I feel like I'm not capable of college (and I do)

 

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

 

So if you need good vibes or if you want to send some to me! You know how to contact me :)